adBlockCheck

Recent News

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
End Of Section
  • More News

The Evidence Against Ivins

The suicide of bioweapons researcher Dr. Bruce Ivins derailed the investigation into his alleged involvement in the 2001 anthrax attacks. The FBI, convinced that he was the guilty party, has unsealed the following evidence:

Personalized Christmas cards featured him in hazmat suit

During his time at the U.S. Army Medical Research Institute of Infectious Diseases, was in charge of the bucket holding the anthrax

Knife, gun found in drawer labeled "weapons that won't be used to kill people"

Cheney said "That's the guy"

Entire apartment reeks strongly of anthrax

A parrot belonging to Ivins that squawks "My name is Bacillus anthracis" over and over

VHS copy of Outbreak

Was totally paranoid that government was after him

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close
settings