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Politics

Bill O’Reilly Tearfully Packs Up Framed Up-Skirt Photos From Desk

NEW YORK—Smiling wistfully as he gazed at the cherished mementos that had sat on his desk for much of the past 20 years, former Fox News commentator Bill O’Reilly reportedly grew teary-eyed Thursday as he packed up the framed up-skirt photos from his work space following his termination by the cable channel.

Donald Trump Jr. Takes Son On Hunting Trip In National Zoo

WASHINGTON—In what he referred to as an important rite of passage for his 8-year-old son, Donald John III, Donald Trump Jr. took his eldest boy to the Smithsonian National Zoological Park for his first-ever hunting trip, sources said Wednesday.
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The Nixon Library's New Watergate Exhibit

A newly revamped exhibit at the Richard Nixon Presidential Library in Yorba Linda, CA details the events behind Watergate and the eventual downfall of the 37th president. Here are some of its new features:

  • Listening station that plays every one of Nixon's taped utterances of the word "cocksucker" in a single rapid-fire four-minute session
  • A detailed explanation of what reel-to-reel tape is
  • An animatronic Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein cackling as they set fire to the Constitution, White House, and American flag
  • The original draft of Nixon's resignation address in which he tells Americans they'll "be sorry"
  • List of all 62,890,119 scandals with the "-gate" suffix
  • Booth where visitors can record their own Nixon-Haldeman filler dialogue to fill in the legendary 18-and-a-half-minute gap in tape 342
  • A bunch of Reagan stuff, just to see if anyone notices
  • A replica of Democratic National Committee headquarters allowing visitors to bungle their very own break-in
  • Arcade, so visitors don't die of boredom

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