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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.

A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:
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The Rising Cost Of Weddings

According to a survey of newlyweds across the country, the average cost of a wedding in the United States is now around $30,000, putting many couples in major debt to celebrate their big day. Here are some common costs that American couples incur at their weddings:

  • $25,000: Standard priest appearance fee
  • $200,000: Rights to My Heart Will Go On for first dance
  • $1.1 million: Lab-grown wedding cake toppers genetically identical to bride and groom
  • $30,000: Rental of chapel large enough to accommodate 900 other Moonies
  • $12: Wedding cake
  • $20,000: Flower girl lessons
  • $8,780: Something blue
  • $4,500: Soft-focus black-and-white image of one wedding ring lying atop another
  • $3,500: Maternity bridal gown
  • $550: Some embarrassing decorative bullshit that looked way better on Pinterest
  • $10,000: Love
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