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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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Tips For First Date Conversation

  • Facilitate small talk by making sure all of your scars are clearly visible.
  • One way to prevent unwanted lags in conversation is to fill out an index card with fun topics in advance and tape it to your date’s forehead for reference.
  • Try not to talk about your own past relationships unless your date brings up John Cena first.
  • Listening is just as important as talking. Really pay attention to what they are saying so you can spot the perfect jumping-off point for a more interesting anecdote of your own.
  • If all else fails, you can always forge common ground by mocking everyone else on a date at the surrounding tables.

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