adBlockCheck

Recent News

Departing Bo Obama Lands K Street Lobbyist Position

WASHINGTON—Touting his lengthy tenure in the White House and close personal relationships with the president of the United States and first lady, executives at Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck announced Monday that once the current administration steps down later this week, the departing Bo Obama will officially join their high-powered K Street lobbying firm.

How To Combat Harassment Online

Online harassment is an increasingly contentious issue, with social media sites like Twitter and Reddit pressured to crack down on users’ abusive behavior. Here are The Onion’s tips for combating harassment online:

Strongside/Weakside: Deshaun Watson

After leading his team to victory in the College Football Playoff National Championship, Clemson University quarterback Deshaun Watson announced he would forgo his final year of eligibility and declare for the NFL Draft. Is he any good?

A Timeline Of Trump’s Relationship With The Press

President-elect Donald Trump routinely insists that he is treated unfairly by the press, while many in the news industry have openly expressed how difficult it can be to report on him in today’s chaotic media environment. Here is a timeline of the major events that have shaped this relationship.
End Of Section
  • More News

Tips For Investigating A Crime Scene

  • Start with a broad sweep of the area, noting any scratches in a wall, scuff marks on the floor, or a notarized letter of confession signed by the perpetrator.
  • Wrap a perimeter of yellow barricade tape around all possible suspects.
  • Carefully label and photograph each individual piece of evidence immediately after you’ve tampered with it.
  • Wait a minute. What was that? Go back to that last photograph. Enhance that area. Yeah, right there. Can you zoom in a little? My god, that’s it—what we’ve been looking for this whole time! Right in front of our noses!
  • Any gawkers should be kept barred from the crime scene, unless of course they’re very curious.


WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close