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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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USC's Rules Violations

The NCAA says Reggie Bush took cash while playing for the Trojans, but that was hardly the only thing that came to light during its investigation of USC:

  • In 2001, the Trojans offered high school quarterback Matt Leinart illegal gifts to persuade him to come to USC, which the NCAA finds just plain embarrassing
  • University caught giving O.J. Mayo 16 academic scholarships for allegedly scoring 125,000 on the SATs
  • Motivated players by hanging bundles of cash from sticks, taping the sticks to their helmets so the cash dangles in front of them
  • Hundreds of recruits asked to give verbal commitment to the school while being held by their ankles and dangled from the Capitol Records building
  • Trojans celebrated BCS championship by dumping Gatorade bucket filled with Dom Pérignon on coach
  • Reggie Bush arrived to the 2005 Heisman Trophy ceremony in gold-plated tank
  • Hired professional soldiers of fortune to helicopter into Samoa, abduct several capable defenders, and bring them back to campus
  • Review of incident reveals that USC did a pretty good job fucking with Lane Kiffin, so the NCAA will reduce the bowl-eligibility penalty by one year
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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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