adBlockCheck

Recent News

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
End Of Section
  • More News

Virgin Unveils New Spaceship

Virgin Galactic, the space tourism venture run by Richard Branson, unveiled its new commercial sub-orbital spacecraft, the SpaceShip Two. Here are some of the features that can be found on the vessel:

Souvenir space helmets that emulate the look of Richard Branson's hair

Complimentary Yukon Gold potato chips

Everything an airplane has but with the word "space" in front of it

Ticker reading Branson's current net worth

Deluxe Tempur-Pedic mattresses, the space-age foam developed by NASA

Awesome robot sex

A "What To Do If You Accidentally Get Shot Into Space" safety video

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close
settings