What The Average Funeral Costs

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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What The Average Funeral Costs

Funeral-related expenses have tripled over the past 25 years to upwards of $6,000 per ceremony, leaving many families struggling to afford the cost of burying a loved one. Here is what the average family spends on a funeral:

  • Graveside catering: $3,000
  • Rights to Psalm 118: $75
  • Urn with “#1 Dad” engraved on side: $400
  • Embalming: $99 per limb
  • Fee for nurse to perform last minute pulse check before sealing casket lid: $5
  • Brother’s speaking fee: $400
  • Electric anti-gopher fence: $699
  • Extra-brawny pallbearers capable of lifting 310-pound corpse: $15 per hour
  • Paying off the mistress: $10,000
  • Closure: $2,482.30