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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Why Women's Professional Soccer Failed in the U.S.

With the sad and unnecessary death of Women's Professional Soccer last week, there is no longer a professional standalone women's soccer league in the United States. Here are the main reasons why:

  • Most teams had fewer than one Hope Solo on their roster at any given time
  • Tried to establish teams in markets where women's soccer isn't traditionally watched, such as the United States
  • Turns out there are already web sites that stream video of kicking women that don't require a sham sports league organized as a cover
  • The shared vision of giving little girls strong, positive role models not actually shared by anyone
  • Missed the mark on the first maxim of sports business: Market to 18-39 year-old men with sad, empty lives
  • The few televised games the league managed to air were in competition with the ability to turn the TV off and go to sleep
  • Many of the best players chose a more lucrative career path, such as unemployment
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