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OB-GYN Assures Serena Williams Fetus Developing Serve On Schedule

WEST PALM BEACH, FL—Observing that the unborn child was producing the smooth, fluid strokes expected in the third trimester, ob-gyn Dr. Theresa Umbers reportedly assured world No. 4–ranked tennis player Serena Williams at an appointment Tuesday that her fetus was developing its serve right on schedule.

New Report Finds MMA Could Be Bad For Your Knees

LOS ANGELES—Following a 10-year study of more than 500 professional and amateur fighters, a report released Thursday by the UCLA Department of Physiology found that mixed martial arts could be bad for your knees.

Mr. Met’s Son Beginning To Think He Adopted

NEW YORK—Pointing out that there was little physical resemblance between himself and the rest of his family, the 10-year-old son of New York Mets mascot Mr. Met told reporters Tuesday that he was beginning to think he was adopted.

Best Sports Stadiums

As Detroit prepares to demolish and say goodbye to the storied Joe Louis Arena, Onion Sports examines some of the greatest stadiums of all time.

Mom Finds Disturbing Reading Material In Teenage Son’s Bedroom

OMAHA, NE—Saying she felt disgusted and saddened by the shocking discovery, local woman Beth Loomis told reporters Thursday that she was deeply disturbed after finding recruitment reading material from the Baylor University football team in her teenage son’s bedroom.

Rookie First Baseman Nervous To Chat With Baserunners

ATLANTA—Noting how important it is to make a good first impression, Pittsburgh Pirates rookie first baseman Josh Bell told reporters before Tuesday’s game against the Atlanta Braves that he’s still nervous about chatting with opposing baserunners.
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WNBA Season Highlights

Onion Sports looks back at the best moments from the 11th season of women's professional basketball:

A mere five years after Lisa Leslie's first slam dunk, the San Antoino Silver Stars' Margo Dydek becomes only the second player in WNBA history to jump

In an odd counterpoint to other sports leagues, the entire WNBA reacts to Lisa Leslie's positive test result with joy at her pregnancy

Indiana Fever sets WNBA record for most Tamikas on a roster

Rumor and speculation run rampant after Mercury star Penny Taylor is seen kissing a boy

Umm...

Everyone in the league shares the MVP award, as each of the WNBA's strong, independent women is valuable—and beautiful—in her own special way

Seattle Storm star Lauren Jackson drains all eight of her team's points in the first half

The playoff game when the ball got wedged between the rim and backboard for 25 minutes until the Detroit Palace custodian knocked it down with the handle of a broom

David Stern is one digit away from making the phone call to cancel the WNBA, but is stopped short when his wife informs him that dinner is ready

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