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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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Horoscope for the week of March 14, 2001

  • Aries

    Aries | March 21 to April 19

    There's a lot to be said for self-improvement, but making yourself more aerodynamic is probably a waste of time.
  • Taurus

    Taurus | April 20 to May 20

    Your generosity with others pays off this week when the terrorists spare most of the hostages in exchange for a helicopter and one million Swiss francs.
  • Gemini

    Gemini | May 21 to June 20

    You're one of those hyper-competitive sorts who believe that something as trivial as a foosball loss makes you a lesser person. Well, it does.
  • Cancer

    Cancer | June 21 to July 22

    It's time to end your long, foolish disagreement with an old friend. Her pronunciation of "tomato" is, in fact, correct.
  • Leo

    Leo | July 23 to Aug. 22

    Look at it this way: Nine times out of ten, you probably would have charmed that snake.
  • Virgo

    Virgo | Aug. 23 to Sept. 22

    You will commit a classic dating faux pas this week when, at a classy French bistro, you shoot your dinner companion 17 times.
  • Libra

    Libra | Sept. 23 to Oct. 22

    Your theory that the human scalp is an ablative heat shield designed to burn off upon re-entry into the atmosphere will be disproved in government tests.
  • Scorpio

    Scorpio | Oct. 23 to Nov. 21

    Deny it all you want, but that giant robot from the Queen album cover is real and he hates you.
  • Sagittarius

    Sagittarius | Nov. 22 to Dec. 21

    Just because you once shoplifted a candy bar in Toronto, that doesn't make you a "suave international criminal."
  • Capricorn

    Capricorn | Dec. 22 to Jan. 19

    Try to overcome your fear of trains this week. Stand in front of one to prove it can't possibly hurt you.
  • Aquarius

    Aquarius | Jan. 20 to Feb. 18

    You can't shake the feeling that there's much more to life than watching Rockford Files reruns all day. However, you can live with it.
  • Pisces

    Pisces | Feb. 19 to March 20

    The stars expect you to be professional and abide by their decision to kill you off to boost ratings and move the sluggish storyline along.

More from this section

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

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