Horoscope for the week of October 22, 1996

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Strongside/Weakside: Serena Williams

Serena Williams is aiming to clinch a historic calendar Grand Slam at this year’s U.S. Open, forever enshrining her as the last American tennis player worth talking about. Is she any good?

The Pros And Cons Of Legalizing Prostitution

Several global advocacy groups, including the World Health Organization, Amnesty International, and Human Rights Watch, are calling for the decriminalization of prostitution, but many are fighting to keep the practice illegal, citing the moral, ethical, and practical concerns of condoning the sale of sex. Here are the pros and cons of legalizing prostitution:
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Horoscope for the week of October 22, 1996

  • Aries

    Aries | March 21 to April 19

    I gotta tell you, if that damn mutt takes another leak on the couch, I'm gonna kill the thing with my bare hands!
  • Taurus

    Taurus | April 20 to May 20

    That dog is so stupid, I swear it's gotta be the stupidest animal I've ever known.
  • Gemini

    Gemini | May 21 to June 20

    Will you please shut that damn dog up? That damn mangy thing is driving me batty. Enough with the barking already!
  • Cancer

    Cancer | June 21 to July 22

    I'll kick you outta this damn house with the dog! How would you like that, you miserable little snot-nosed punk?
  • Leo

    Leo | July 23 to Aug. 22

    Don't tell me that I scared the goddamn dog. I'm not going to let some goddamn dog tell me how to run my life!
  • Virgo

    Virgo | Aug. 23 to Sept. 22

    C'mere, you goddamn dog! Come here right now, you frickin' dog! You damn dog
  • Libra

    Libra | Sept. 23 to Oct. 22

    This house ain't big enough for me and that damn lousy dog.
  • Scorpio

    Scorpio | Oct. 23 to Nov. 21

    That damn dog! Oooh, that damn dog! Oooh!
  • Sagittarius

    Sagittarius | Nov. 22 to Dec. 21

    I'll kill that dog, it's got me so upset. I don't think I've ever been so damn mad as I am right now at that stupid dog.
  • Capricorn

    Capricorn | Dec. 22 to Jan. 19

    Knock over my ficus plant, will you, dog? Get that damn dog outta my house!
  • Aquarius

    Aquarius | Jan. 20 to Feb. 18

    I'm asking you, who wanted the damn dog in the first place? It wasn't me! I hate you and that stinking dog!
  • Pisces

    Pisces | Feb. 19 to March 20

    @#!! That dog! Oooh! @#*!!!