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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Ugh, This A Place Where Bartenders Wear Bow Tie

PITTSBURGH—Saying they should have known from the moment they walked in the unmarked speakeasy entrance and spotted the extensive wood paneling, customers confirmed Friday that, ugh, this is one of those places where the bartenders all wear bow ties.

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Your Horoscope

  • Aries

    Aries | March 21 to April 19

    Life will continue to feel like a juggling act this week when you're forced to balance work, family, three plastic rings, a bowling pin, one of those soft juggling balls, two chainsaws, and nursing school.
  • Taurus

    Taurus | April 20 to May 20

    Your body language will once again give you away this week, leaving little doubt as to whether or not you're suffering a seizure.
  • Gemini

    Gemini | May 21 to June 20

    After years of earning a living on your back, you'll be amazed this Friday by just how much you can bring in on your stomach.
  • Cancer

    Cancer | June 21 to July 22

    You will experience an almost Pavlovian response this week when the mere mention of classical conditioning and other behavioral experiments leaves you instantly bored.
  • Leo

    Leo | July 23 to Aug. 22

    While many may claim that you've changed, you still put your pants on like everyone else: one prosthetic leg at a time.
  • Virgo

    Virgo | Aug. 23 to Sept. 22

    You'll have a tough time putting this Thursday's shocking scene into words, but then, that's what the police department keeps an oversized Pictionary pad around for.
  • Libra

    Libra | Sept. 23 to Oct. 22

    Of all the plans you had for what you'd do with a million dollars, serving 12 years for grand larceny was probably last on your list.
  • Scorpio

    Scorpio | Oct. 23 to Nov. 21

    You will come face to face with your worst fears this week after standing in front of a bathroom mirror.
  • Sagittarius

    Sagittarius | Nov. 22 to Dec. 21

    Much to your surprise, a meal prepared with hate, regret, and unflinching resentment will soon leave your kids begging for seconds.
  • Capricorn

    Capricorn | Dec. 22 to Jan. 19

    This week you will once again pray exactly 243 times for God to heal you of your obsessive-compulsive disorder.
  • Aquarius

    Aquarius | Jan. 20 to Feb. 18

    The stars, in their infinite wisdom, caution you this week against coming a-knockin' if the trailer is indeed rockin'.
  • Pisces

    Pisces | Feb. 19 to March 20

    You will soon learn that patience—the ability to endure prolonged delays without becoming annoyed, upset, or even frustrated, especially when unnecessary holdups and long, drawn-out, time-consuming interruptions seem as trivial as they are trying—is a virtue.

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