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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Your Horoscope

  • Aries

    Aries | March 21 to April 19

    Just when things are beginning to look up, the three-ton wrecking ball will come swinging back in your direction.
  • Taurus

    Taurus | April 20 to May 20

    While your new skirt leaves little to the imagination, many will still try to picture it on a woman instead.
  • Gemini

    Gemini | May 21 to June 20

    Your finances and your health are equally important. Unfortunately, the sale of your last kidney will soon bring an end to both.
  • Cancer

    Cancer | June 21 to July 22

    They say dogs are man's best friend, but you'll realize yours has been letting you win at checkers this entire time.
  • Leo

    Leo | July 23 to Aug. 22

    A masterful game of cunning, subterfuge and daring will help you to secure the last remaining slice of pizza this Thursday.
  • Virgo

    Virgo | Aug. 23 to Sept. 22

    If you think he's angry about your tryst with his daughter, just wait until the farmer finds out what you did to his son.
  • Libra

    Libra | Sept. 23 to Oct. 22

    Your belief in an omnipotent being that lives above the clouds may sound ridiculous, but it's the fact that you think He's out to do good that's truly preposterous.
  • Scorpio

    Scorpio | Oct. 23 to Nov. 21

    Thomas Edison described genius as one percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration. Still, that's no reason to brag about what you do in the bathroom.
  • Sagittarius

    Sagittarius | Nov. 22 to Dec. 21

    You'll save half-a-dozen orphans from a burning building this week, though to be fair, that's largely because you'll refuse to go back in for their parents.
  • Capricorn

    Capricorn | Dec. 22 to Jan. 19

    Revolving restaurants can make for a nice and relaxing outing. Sadly, yours will spin along the other axis.
  • Aquarius

    Aquarius | Jan. 20 to Feb. 18

    The most important thing is that you tried, or at least it will be during your attempted murder trial next week.
  • Pisces

    Pisces | Feb. 19 to March 20

    Lately it seems like nobody respects your feelings, but why don't you just shut up for a second and let the stars worry about it.