Your Horoscope 4150

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Vol 41 Issue 50

Howard Stern Leaves The Air

Howard Stern's last show on conventional radio aired last Friday, as he will make the jump to Sirius Satellite Radio in early 2006. What do...

Gay Cowboy Film Buzz

Brokeback Mountain, Ang Lee's controversial gay cowboy film, is generating Oscar buzz. What do you think?

Race Riots In Australia

This week saw race riots raging around Sydney, Australia, after white supremacists stormed the beaches and beat suspected Arabs. What do you...
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TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Small Business

Family

Report: Dad Wants To Show You Where Fuse Box Is

YOUR LOCATION—Noting that it’s important to be prepared in case of emergencies but it’s also a good thing to know in general, your dad announced today that he wants to show you where the fuse box is.

Your Horoscope 4150

  • Aries

    Aries

    The last time you made a snow angel, you were but a child. Also, you weren't flailing your limbs wildly in a desperate attempt to free yourself from a knife-wielding psychopath.
  • Taurus

    Taurus

    After months of being woken up at all hours by your newborn daughter, you will finally be able to sleep soundly this week after it's decided that she should stay overnight at the local hospital for further tests.
  • Gemini

    Gemini

    You'll become famous company-wide for your popularization of the emoticon "Down Syndrome Kid Flips You Off." Shortly thereafter, you'll be justifiably fired, you insensitive asshole.
  • Cancer

    Cancer

    You’ve always claimed to like a good mystery, but that was before they found your daughter’s body floating in the ravine.
  • Leo

    Leo

    The interesting thing about homicidal rage is—well, the stars don't want to ruin it for you.
  • Virgo

    Virgo

    After years of insisting it's just a phase, you'll finally come to accept your parents' homophobia this week.
  • Libra

    Libra

    You'll cry yourself to sleep yet again tonight, much to the envy of insomniacs across the country.
  • Scorpio

    Scorpio

    This week, the stars will grant you your heart's deepest desire, causing you confusion when bags of money arrive in place of your long-lost son.
  • Sagittarius

    Sagittarius

    While some questions can only be answered by searching deep within, whatever happened to your spleen and small intestine isn't one of them.
  • Capricorn

    Capricorn

    The fear of being buried alive has often consumed your thoughts, but as you'll soon discover, the alternative is much, much worse.
  • Aquarius

    Aquarius

    You'll have an instant hit on your hands next week after releasing a rap single that not only features your area code, but also your full zip code, social-security number, and mother's maiden name.
  • Pisces

    Pisces

    If the holiday season yields invitations you feel compelled to accept, you could always follow the example of Frank Conroy's father, as outlined on the first page of his memoir Stop Time.
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