The Week In Sports

OB-GYN Assures Serena Williams Fetus Developing Serve On Schedule

WEST PALM BEACH, FL—Observing that the unborn child was producing the smooth, fluid strokes expected in the third trimester, ob-gyn Dr. Theresa Umbers reportedly assured world No. 4–ranked tennis player Serena Williams at an appointment Tuesday that her fetus was developing its serve right on schedule.

New Report Finds MMA Could Be Bad For Your Knees

LOS ANGELES—Following a 10-year study of more than 500 professional and amateur fighters, a report released Thursday by the UCLA Department of Physiology found that mixed martial arts could be bad for your knees.
End Of Section
  • More News

Biggest Sports Franchise Relocations

With the Oakland Raiders leaving for Las Vegas in 2020, Onion Sports looks back on some of the biggest franchise relocations in history.

  • 1937

    The Boston Redskins relocate to Washington, D.C. and take immediate advantage of the fresh start by finally changing their nickname

  • 1961

    Washington Senators begin playing home games in Minneapolis on weekdays and Baltimore on weekends as part of an MLB joint custody agreement

  • 1979

    The NBA’s New Orleans Jazz relocate to Salt Lake City and became the Utah Tabernacle Choir

  • 1993

    Habana’s Metropolitanos baseball club defects from Cuba on a small raft and lands in Miami, where they assume a new identity as the Florida Marlins

  • 1995

    Relocating the Cleveland Browns to Baltimore and changing their name was tragically not enough to attain Art Modell’s dream of ensuring no football player would ever again have to don a Browns jersey

  • 1999

    Jefferson Valley Little League now includes sluggers from the neighboring hamlet of Bush Pines following a change in district zoning

  • 2005

    The Montreal Expos must move back home to Washington, D.C. following the expiration of their work visa

  • 2006

    Following years of threats and bitter negotiations, the Arizona Cardinals break the hearts of millions of fans by abandoning Tempe for lush Glendale

  • 2016

    Unable to choose to between St. Louis and Los Angeles, the NFL’s Rams compromise and relocate to Springer, New Mexico, the midpoint between the two cities

  • 2025

    Jacksonville-area fans are informed that the Jaguars have been playing all of their home games in London for three years

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.