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Politics

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Trump’s Budget Proposal: What You Need To Know

President Trump has revealed his first budget blueprint, which contains $54 billion in cuts while accommodating increased spending on defense and security. The Onion details the major elements of Trump’s proposed budget:
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The Pros And Cons Of Universal Basic Income

As Finland tests a program to give a universal basic income to unemployed citizens, many wonder if a similar initiative could work in the United States. Here are some pros and cons of such a program:

  • Pro
    • Would make people feel valued by their government in precise capitalist terms they can understand

    • Privileged elite no longer the only ones with access to Pizza Hut Triple Treat Box

    • Whole basic human dignity thing

    • Opens up more opportunities to use the phrase “sucking at the government’s teat”

    • The look on some rich prick’s face hearing about this for the first time

    • More marks for your pyramid scheme

  • Con
    • System can be exploited by “welfare queens” who live lavishly on the spoils of their $500 monthly allotment

    • Recipients might lose sight of the value of hard work, the most noble and treasured aspect of American life

    • Would take forever to sign all those checks

    • Encourages entrepreneurship among dumbasses who dream of opening a fucking cupcake truck or some other bullshit

    • The long-term effects of bestowing lower class with a sense of dignity are currently unknown

    • Leveling the playing field would be detrimental to the vast minority of Americans

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