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Tips

Tips For Back-To-School Shopping

As kids prepare to go back to school, parents are tasked with providing all the supplies and clothes they’ll need for the year. Here are The Onion’s tips for tackling back-to-school shopping.

Choosing The Right Dog For You

Once you decide to get a dog, there’s a wide range of adoptable pets to choose from, whether it’s a mutt or purebred. The Onion offers some helpful tips for choosing the dog that’s right for you.

Choosing The Right School For Your Child

With a new school year beginning soon, parents are making decisions about which type of school best fits their child’s needs. The Onion breaks down what each has to offer.

The Onion’s Beach Bag Essentials

Each summer, Americans flock to the coasts to enjoy the sun and waves. Here are the beach bag must-haves you should never head to the shore without.

Top Family Vacation Spots

With school out for the summer, families are packing up and hitting the road. Here are The Onion’s top family vacation destinations.
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Tips For Writing A Screenplay

  • Every great writer must start somewhere. Begin by pouring $156,000 into an undergraduate degree.

  • Your screenplay should address a central unifying question, such as “How do we as humans transcend the tragedy of loss?” or “What have those Smurfs been up to lately?”

  • Shatter the conventional expectations for female leads by developing a protagonist who is both intelligent and attractive—but who knows how to crack a joke, too.

  • Consider including at least one character named Big Jeff.

  • Anytime you use “FADE OUT” at the end of a scene, remember that the audience can’t see anything that’s happening until you fade back in.

  • Indicate clearly at the beginning of each scene how VFX will make it worth watching.

  • Take an occasional step back to review your script and double-check that a sense of artistic validation isn’t obstructing its commercial viability.

  • Once your first draft is finished, scan for spelling errors, then crack open a pack of brass fasteners.

More from this section

Tips For Back-To-School Shopping

As kids prepare to go back to school, parents are tasked with providing all the supplies and clothes they’ll need for the year. Here are The Onion’s tips for tackling back-to-school shopping.

Choosing The Right Dog For You

Once you decide to get a dog, there’s a wide range of adoptable pets to choose from, whether it’s a mutt or purebred. The Onion offers some helpful tips for choosing the dog that’s right for you.

Choosing The Right School For Your Child

With a new school year beginning soon, parents are making decisions about which type of school best fits their child’s needs. The Onion breaks down what each has to offer.

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