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Politics

Trump’s Budget Proposal: What You Need To Know

President Trump has revealed his first budget blueprint, which contains $54 billion in cuts while accommodating increased spending on defense and security. The Onion details the major elements of Trump’s proposed budget:

  • NASA granted $350 to fund upcoming manned mission to Mars

  • Greatly expands State Department’s available office space

  • Allocates $1 billion for across-the-board revitalization of nation’s underperforming prisons

  • Defense budget raised to achieve long-standing goal of removing ballistic missiles from endangered weaponry list

  • Sea level increased by 4 percent

  • Unconscionable amount slashed from costume budget for Cincinnati Ballet’s spring production of Petrushka

  • Larger Department of Veterans Affairs budget to accommodate upcoming spike in cases of PTSD

  • Pretty much in line with everyday Americans’ demand for more guns and fewer books, paintings, parks, doctors, schools, corruption investigations, scientists, and animals

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