GUATEMALA CITY—Alvaro Rodriguez, the first winner of the new Guatemalan "Scratch 'n' Win" national lottery, is now the proud owner of his own sewing ...

SHIOCTON, WI—The banking and portable beverage communities were thrown into an uproar Sunday with the discovery of a plastic sports bottle mysteriously bearing the ...

MIDVALE, CA—The intensive care ward of Midvale Children's Hospital might not seem like the likeliest place for a happy story. But tragedy, if ...

CAMBRIDGE, MA—This is the first discovery in this field since physicist Richard Feynman isolated Lauren Hutton's "aloof pout" in 1974.

FORT BENNING, GA—The defense secretary has ordered a full investigation into all rumored cases of Army-related killing.

CHICAGO—Police detective Ed "Rusty" Hodges, who has served the Chicago Police Department with distinction for more than 45 years, placed his life in severe ...

DUBLIN—In what many record- industry insiders are calling a return to the band's mid-'80s prime, members of U2 announced Monday plans to ...

MUNCHKINLAND, OZ—Elated Munchkins celebrated the release of their Chinese protectorate province Wednesday following the death of Chinese leader Deng Xiaoping Sunday. "Deng, Deng, Xiaoping ...

WASHINGTON, DC—Retail clerk Tony Bellarusso was ordered by the U.S. Congress Monday to see if he has any in the back. "See if ...

NEW YORK—Thomas Hill, publicist for the Scarsdale & Loeb Group, expressed his excitement over a great big pile of crap Thursday. "I'm really excited ...

After nealy a year of phenomenal slaes, fat-free food products are beginning to decline in popularity. Why aren't Americans buying fat-free items?

An old euphemism will come in handy this week when your roommate ingests too much acid, causing him to sit in the living room and ...

Ask A Salmon is a weekly syndicated advice column that appears in over 250 newspapers nationwide

A number of public-safety groups are lobbying Congress to pass legislation banning car phones, calling them dangerous and distracting to the driver. What do you ...