OLYMPIA, WA—Slightly paunchy, thin-haired Robert Pelton, 27, is just like a brother to area musician Tara Leland, the attractive blonde said Monday.

ERIE, PA—While removing an insurance card from an infrequently used section of his wallet Monday, local resident Don Turnbee came across a soda-winning Inspector ...

NEW YORK—Staring and gazing skills also increase markedly after watching cartoons for as little as three hours.

MALDEN, MA—Visitors claim that there was no fiendish fun to be had throughout the entire non-hair-raising experience.

MONTPELIER, VT—A bag of Murley's Steak & Onion Potato Chips deeply disturbed Montpelier-area snacker Vince Houghton Monday, delivering an artificially created flavor so similar ...

EAST ST. LOUIS, IL—The November issue of Poverty magazine, featuring its annual "Top American Cities" poll, hit newsstands Monday, and for the second year ...

DARLINGTON, SC—According to loud reports from within the Kaminsky household Tuesday, if area father Russell Kaminsky steps on one more goddamn Lego, man, forget ...

SOUTHFIELD, MI—Detroit radio station Lite 108's claim of being "the station you relax at work with" proved false Monday, when M&I Marketing ...

GARLAND, TX—Local resident Jesse McCombs' sole remaining lung filled with the rich, satisfying flavor of Parliament cigarettes Monday. "Mmm, now that's a good ...

Recently, a woman defeated a man in the first-ever professionally sanctioned mixed-sex boxing match, and ESPN plans to air an upcoming fight featureing Muhammed Ali ...

You will be distressed to find yourself listed under "old oil bottles" in your local sanitation department's "recyclopedia."

Though it may seem cruel, the reality is, a handout to that homeless panhandler you see on the street will do him more harm than ...

It was announced last week that the U.S. crime rate is down for the seventh year in a row, falling to its lowest level ...