Food Critic Tears Radish Canapés With Salmon Mousse A New Asshole
MANCHESTER, NH—Bernard Haberle "skull-fucked" the French appetizer by calling it a "misguided fusion of land and sea."
Issue 4136
Cheney Dropped By White House HMO
WASHINGTON, DC—Citing pre-existing conditions, Dick Cheney’s insurance provider terminated his health coverage Monday.
Clairvoyant Vince Vaughn Accepts Movie Role Before It's Offered
HOLLYWOOD, CA—Vince Vaughn telephoned his agent Norman Falbaum Monday, saying only, "Tell Owen yes." According to Falbaum, the phone rang again...
Bush Tearfully Addresses Nation After Watching Field Of Dreams
WASHINGTON, DC-Moments after watching a TNT afternoon showing of 1989 sports tearjerker Field of Dreams, a visibly moved President Bush interrupted...
New York Philharmonic Hosts Open-Mic Night
NEW YORK—The New York Philharmonic Orchestra announced Monday that it will continue its popular open-mic nights throughout the 2005 fall season,...
Iraqi Constitution
Iraq unveiled the final draft of its constitution last week. What are some of the provisions?
September 7, 1901
McKinley Attacked By Wild Boar
Little League World Series Marred By Cutest Little Allegations Of Steroid Abuse
WILLIAMSPORT, PA—Three players in the Little League World Series, two from West-region teams and one from the Southwest, tested positive for...
Death Of The Chief Justice
William Rehnquist, the chief justice of the U.S. Supreme Court, died Saturday at age 80. What do you think?
Racial Profiling Okay?
A recent study shows that most Americans do not have a problem with racial profiling by law enforcement officers. What do you think?
Chimp Genome Mapped
Scientists have mapped the complete chimp genome and are comparing it to the human genome to see what sets the two species apart. What do ...
CBGB's Lease Expires
The landlord of the CBGB's building announced that he will not renew the lease of the legendary New York club. What do you think?
Strategic Oil Reserves
In the wake of Hurricane Katrina, President Bush is tapping the strategic oil reserve to help petroleum refiners. What do you think?
California's Gay-Marriage Bill
Last week, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger said he will veto the gay-marriage bill passed by California’s state legislature. What do you think?
