NEW YORKWith the newly implemented dress code being met with criticism from players like Allen Iverson and Marcus Camby, NBA Commissioner David Stern announced Wednesday that he will clarify any and all concerns by imposing an even stricter, more detailed code of dress and conduct so that players can more accurately follow it to the letter.
Several recent bills have passed that absolve corporations of liability if consumers are harmed by their products, and President Bush is expected to sign them into law. What are some details of similar proposed legislation?
BELMONT, NC—Channeling the timeless elegance of the silver screen, 12-year-old Kaitlyn Falk was reportedly the very image of old Hollywood glamour after getting her hair curled by her aunt for her middle school’s spring dance on Friday.
FREEHOLD, NJ—Saying it hasn’t always been easy inventing reasons for not attending one of his gigs, local man John Gilman, 68, told reporters Thursday that he has spent approximately 50 years coming up with excuses to avoid checking out the band of high school classmate Bruce Springsteen.
GAMMA CEPHEI STAR SYSTEM—Taking long hits of euphoria plasma from his electro-collider bong, stoned extraterrestrial Zogart 21X Flaxum stumbled across a hidden message Friday after listening to the Voyager 1 probe’s Golden Record backwards.