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Christian Weightlifter Bends Iron Bar To Show Power Of God's Love

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Issue 4252

Cardinals Apologize For Winning World Series

ST. LOUIS—Calling Friday night's victory on baseball's grandest stage "a terrible mistake," members of the St. Louis Cardinals issued a formal apology for making the playoffs, winning the World Series, and depriving baseball fans everywhere...

Overjoyed Saints Fans Tear Roof Off Reopened Superdome

NEW ORLEANS—Over 70,000 elated New Orleans Saints fans celebrated the first professional football game to take place in the newly renovated Superdome since Hurricane Katrina Monday night by joyously rushing from their seats onto the field,...

Somalia Defeats Rwanda To Win Third-World Cup

KHARTOUM, SUDAN—The host city of the 2006 Developing Nations Football Championship erupted in cheers that nearly drowned out the cries of the starving and wounded Tuesday when the underdog Somali side, playing four down due to injuries and landmines, outlasted the more experienced if disease-ridden Rwandans 1-0 to win the inaugural Third-World Cup.

Sportscaster Claims You Hate To See That

BRISTOL, CT—Despite the clip airing on the 6 p.m., 8 p.m., and 11 p.m. broadcasts of SportsCenter, ESPN anchor Chris Berman claimed that “a devastating injury of that nature is not what fans come to see,” in reference to a viciou...
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