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Rocky II, III, IV Decisions Overturned After Stallone Caught With Performance-Enhancing Drugs

• Retired Gen. George Washington Criticizes Bush's Handling Of Iraq War

  ISSUE 47•52 ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | News

  WASHINGTON, D.C.—The Revolutionary War veteran noted that while Hussein was a tyrant, that alone did not justify a "conflict that seems without design or end." more»

  

• Study: Many Americans Too Fat To Commit Suicide

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.08.07 | News

  LOS ANGELES—A disturbing percentage of Americans are too large to ascend a footstool, too inflexible to kick it away, and too heavy to dangle from an ill-fitting rope. more»

  

• Banjo Player Sought In Hootenanny Spree

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.09.07 | News

  BOSTON—"These constant hootenannings must stop," said Mayor Menino, a staunch critic since Faneuil Hall's doors were forcibly removed and used as a dancing surface. more»

  

• Uncool Zookeeper Won't Let Anyone Ride Gorillas

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.04.07 | News in Brief

  BROOKFIELD, IL—Despite heartfelt pleas, Janice Petrone, a totally lame and uncool zookeeper at the Brookfield Zoo, repeatedly told a group... more»

• Nation Hoping For A Windy Flag Day

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.05.07 | News in Brief

  WASHINGTON, DC—With June 14 just a week away, citizens nationwide are hoping that brisk, windy weather is in store for this Flag... more»

• Audience Calls Candidates Back On Stage For Debate Encore

  ISSUE 44•01 ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | News in Brief

  MANCHESTER, NH—A sold-out crowd at St. Anselm College refused to leave after the Republican presidential debate came to a close Tuesday,... more»

• Second Life Makes Dream Of Owning Fictitious Coffee Shop Come True

  ISSUE 45•01 ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | News in Brief

  HAILEY, ID—As a teenager, Kerry Jarrett never thought she would have the opportunity to own and operate a completely fabricated coffee shop... more»

• Craig Kilborn Ready To Return To The Daily Show

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.09.07 | News in Brief

  LOS ANGELES—Former late-night television personality Craig Kilborn announced Monday that he has decided to return to the show he says he... more»

• Bush To Double AIDS Funding

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | Infographic

  President Bush is seeking to double the amount the U.S. is spending to fight global AIDS to $30 billion in five years. Where will the money... more»

  

• Your Horoscope

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | Horoscope

• Least Popular Alcoholic Drinks

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | Statshot

  

• Secret Service Agent Takes Out Dandelion On White House Lawn

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.05.07 | Radio News

• Teen Injured Mimicking Crucifixion He Saw On Christian TV

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | Radio News

• Company Produces Lifestyle, Not Corn Chip

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.08.07 | Radio News

• Phantom Of The Opera Viewers Treated For Post-Melodramatic Stress Disorder

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.09.07 | Radio News

• Scientific Journal Releases List of Top 100 Compounds

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.10.07 | Radio News

• New Cruise Ship Constructed Entirely From Buffets

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.11.07 | Radio News

• Meg White Drum Solo Maintains Steady Beat For 23 Minutes

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.05.07 | News in Photos

  

• Area Man Good For The Economy

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | News in Photos

  

• With All Due Respect, I Choose Not To Go Fuck Myself

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | Commentary

  Sir. Sir. Sir! Now that you have, I dare say, made your opinion on this matter more than abundantly clear, might I finally be afforded the... more»

• Hey, Wasn't There Some Sort Of National Tragedy A Few Months Back?

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | Commentary

  Wait a minute. I could swear that I was recently shocked and outraged about something that felt really significant. But now I can't for the life... more»

• June 8, 1944

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.04.07 | History

  War Rationing Board Restricts Nylon Use to Armed Forces, J. Edgar Hoover Only more»

  

• Mitt Romney: Does He Wear That Weird Underwear?

  ISSUE 44•01 ISSUE 43•23 | 06.08.07 | Sunday Magazine

  

• Editorial Cartoon - June 8, 2007

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.08.07 | Editorial Cartoon

  

• Tim Duncan Rooting For Cavaliers For Good Of NBA

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | Sports News

  SAN ANTONIO—San Antonio Spurs All-Star center Tim Duncan told reporters yesterday that he is rooting for the Cleveland Cavaliers to win this year's NBA Finals, stating that a Cavaliers victory is "exactly what the NBA needs right... more»

  

• Lou Piniella Appeals For Suspension To Last For Entire Contract

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | Sports News in Brief

  CHICAGO—After MLB executive vice president for administration John McHale Jr. announced that Chicago Cubs manager Lou Piniella would be... more»

• God Wondering If He's Being Too Cruel In Allowing Cavaliers To Reach NBA Finals

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | Sports News in Brief

  PARADISE—God, the omnipotent and omniscient Creator of the Universe who recently saw fit to allow the Cleveland Cavaliers to advance to the... more»

• Tom Glavine: 'I'm Never Gonna Get My 300th Win, Am I?'

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | Sports News in Brief

  NEW YORK—Following a no-decision after two consecutive losses—a three-game span in which the Mets scored a combined three... more»

• Isiah Thomas Asks Mike Brown If He Could Coach One Game Of Finals

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | Sports News in Brief

  CLEVELAND—New York Knicks coach and president of basketball operations Isiah Thomas, distraught over his team's failure to make the playoffs... more»

  

• A History Of Head Injuries In Sports

  ISSUE 43•52 ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | Sportsgraphic

  The NFL is joining other sanctioning bodies in researching methods of preventing head injuries after studies revealed players have been suffering... more»

  

• London Unveils 2012 Olympics Logo To Stunned Silence

  ISSUE 43•52 ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | Photo Finish

  

• In The Know: America Braces For New Wayans Brothers Movie

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | In The Know

  One year after Little Man, panelists discuss whether America can handle another movie from the Wayans Brothers. more»

  

• J.K. Rowling Hints At Harry Potter Date Rape

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.04.07 | Newsroom

  Calling the final Harry Potter book her "darkest yet," J.K. Rowling confirmed one of the characters in it will be date raped. more»

  

• Airline Passenger Has TB

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.04.07 | American Voices

  An Atlanta lawyer recently flew two transatlantic flights after being diagnosed with a rare and dangerous strain of tuberculosis. What do you... more»

• Creation Museum Grand Opening

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.05.07 | American Voices

  The Creation Museum, which holds that the Bible is the supreme authority, opened last week in Kentucky. What do you think? more»

• The 49 States Of America?

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.06.07 | American Voices

  A secession movement has been gaining traction in the state of Vermont. What do you think? more»

• Scooter Libby Sentenced For Lying

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.07.07 | American Voices

  I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby was sentenced to 30 months in prison for obstructing the Valerie Plame CIA leak investigation. What do you think?" more»

• Rep. Jefferson Under Investigation

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.08.07 | American Voices

  The House has ordered a speedy ethics probe into the dealings of Rep. William J. Jefferson (D-LA) that could oust him before he goes to trial on... more»

• Technology

  ISSUE 43•23 | 06.05.07 | Slideshow

  

• very_sunny

  Feels like the very first time

• Coke Can Becomes Official U.S. 12-Ounce Measure

• Child Beginning To Resemble Owner

• Casey Affleck Still Not Famous Enough To Have Name On Ocean's 13 Billboard

• DURHAM, NC—Kate and Andy Clark, both 34, couldn't bear to remove the "For Sale" sign from the front yard of their new home, as it was there when they fell in love with the house and it "wouldn't look right without it."

• MCLEAN, TX—The 27th consecutive beating 8-year-old Trevor Willards suffered today only strengthened his resolve to become a statistician.

• ST. PAUL, MN—$3000 into her scrapbooking hobby, Christine McGhee realized there was no one she trusted to look at her scrapbooks.

• Poland Springs (PSG)

  With stiff competition from Aquafina, Poland Spring enjoyed an upswing in sales after adding high-fructose corn syrup, phosphoric acid, caffeine, caramel coloring, and carbonation.