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Issue 4506

Digital TV Conversion Delayed

Congress voted to move the conversion to digital television from Feb. 17 to June 12 because of a shortage of government funding for coupons that help...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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  • The Onion’s Guide To Gym Etiquette

    Every new year brings a surge in gym membership from new members nicknamed “resolutionists,” many of whom may be unaware that there are unspoken rules everyone must observe when working out.


Political Friendships

Fritolaysia Cuts Off Chiplomatic Relations With Snakistan
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Long-Standing Conflict Ends As Israel Returns Lawn Mower To Palestine
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World Leaders Gather To Roast Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
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Canada, India Sheepishly Resolve Border Dispute
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U.S. Gives Up Trying To Impress England
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Relations Break Down Between U.S. And Them
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Kim Jong-Il Interprets Sunrise As Act Of War
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Child Walks Out On Toy Non-Proliferation Talks
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