WASHINGTON—Between eye rolls, sighs, and repeated glances at wall clocks, the majority of Americans are reporting that the nation badly needs to pick up ...

LOS ANGELES—"Praise be the one, true Tim Hutton," yelled a masked member of the Ordinary People's Front, before firing a semiautomatic weapon wildly ...

SOUTH NATICK, MA—"I put out traps to catch those crafty bastards, but the only thing I ever caught was poor Louis [O'Halloran] from ...

NEW YORK—A new study published in The Journal Of Pediatric Medicine found that a shocking 98 percent of all infants suffer from...

LOS ANGELES—Frustrated TV producers announced Monday that they have nearly exhausted every combination of people that can be made to dance...

CHICAGO—The heavily intoxicated man seated next to you is dangerously close to realizing you've been fucking with him this entire time,...

ATHENS, GA—Local barista Benjamin Shields, 31, expressed both shock and remorse Monday when, during a routine perusal of his 2009 calendar,...

WEST PALM BEACH, FL—While ferociously laying into what he calls the "liberal jihad against the flat tax," conservative pundit and talk radio...

Last week, the nation was outraged to learn that members of the division responsible for the calamitous credit default swaps that brought down...

PHOENIX—"I never saw anything written on the ball before," said O'Neal, adding that he had not considered the possibility of using a basketball ...

DAYTON, OH—In a dramatic three-point play with 7.2 seconds left in their first-round game, the No. 9 seed Tennessee Men's Lady Vols ...

DENVER—The Broncos' front office continues to rebuff trade overtures from the New York Jets, who persist in their attempts to trade a...

MIAMI—Back with their respective teams after a second disappointing showing in the World Baseball Classic, Team USA expressed relief to be...

DETROIT—With three rounds and the championship game remaining in the 2009 NCAA men's basketball tournament, documents believing to be the...

BRISTOL, CT—Sportswriter Marc Stein was diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder and prescribed a low dose of Risperdal Tuesday after...

In honor of Kurt and Kyle Busch winning back-to-back NASCAR races, we look at other sporting brothers and sisters:

Hard-throwing pitcher Curt Schilling announced his retirement Monday. Was the three-time World Series winner any good?

Business Week ranked the airport last in customer satisfaction due to long delays, bureaucratic employees, and overall oppressive atmosphere.

Rep. David Whittle (D-VA) speaks passionately about how his son, who died in Iraq, would have loved to see this appropriations bill passed.

Defense Department officials said that, rather than requiring troops to stay on after their term of enlistment expires, they will begin offering them...

Following the testing of a missile defense system, the Senate Armed Services Committee was told that there is a "high probability" that they could...

A federal study revealed that middle-aged Americans who ate red meat at least once a day were 30 percent more likely to die during the ...

A federal judge has ruled that the Food and Drug Administration failed to follow its own protocols when reviewing the birth control pill Plan B ...

The city of Sacramento, CA is going to add more beds to homeless shelters to accomodate the 150 people currently living in from an encampment ...