WASHINGTON—"If your grandmother would rather be euthanized in the privacy of her own home than be gutted and hanged on a high school soccer ...

THE HEAVENS—Available in two colors­—male and female—the bird reportedly combines everything God has learned from His previous works into one "new twist ...

FORT SCOTT, KS—"Honestly, I don't see the people of Fort Scott looking to one another for solace during this trying time, or really ...

WASHINGTON—Following a Monday morning staff meeting, White House sources said it has become clear that Department of the Ulterior head...

HOLLYWOOD, CA—Critic Kate Ward told reporters Monday that she has given director Stewart Hendler a chance to reshoot his horror-thriller...

DENVER—Discarding a number of twigs that did not conform to his high standards, Nicholas Thompson, 5, finally selected a favorite stick from...

BOSTON—Despite having never before given the topic a moment's thought, maintenance mechanic Ron Krueger, 46, aggressively defended his home...

ABINGDON, MD—In order to dispel any confusion regarding the contents of a 42-ounce Quaker Oats canister used in the play Drugs...

Once heralded as a shrewd innovator, embattled CEO Ken Lewis is now leaving Bank Of America. Here are some key missteps from the past 18 ...

BRISTOL, CT—In what is being called the biggest gaffe in the sports network's 30-year history, ESPN totally forgot to cover last week's ...

PHILADELPHIA—In an absolutely precious little press conference before the start of the NLDS Wednesday, the upstart Colorado Rockies confirmed that they would be making ...

NEWARK, NJ—In a game that everyone in the stands and on the ice believed to be a tune-up before the NHL's regular season ...

DETROIT—According to a local police report, Tigers first baseman Miguel Cabrera only connected on a pitiful 13 of 67 swings during an...

MILWAUKEE—While shopping for used equipment at a local Play It Again Sports franchise Tuesday, Bucks general manager John Hammond reportedly...

NEW ORLEANS—Saints defensive tackle Remi Ayodele announced plans Monday to write a children's book called Tubbo Makes A Touchdown

With the 2009 regular season out of the way, Onion Sports runs down what to look for during the postseason.

After four weeks, the New York Giants' Steve Smith currently leads the league in receiving. Is he any good?

The CDC's new anti-smoking campaign effectively reaches teens with a simple message: if you smoke, people are going to know you're totally crazy ...

Corpses are piling up in the Wayne County Morgue in Detroit because families and loved ones can't afford to bury or cremate the bodies ...

A nearly complete skeleton of a Tyrannosaurus rex found in South Dakota was put up for auction at the Venetian casino in Las Vegas last ...

A new government study published in the journal Pediatrics indicates that one in every 91 American children is affected by autism instead of...

A study conducted by a statistical information company concluded that drivers of Hummers received 4.63 times the number of citations other drivers...

An Associated Press poll shows that 38 percent of all parents do not want their children vaccinated against the H1N1 virus, or swine flu. What ...