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God Hinting At Retirement

• Local Family Homeless After Tornado Destroys White House

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.21.10 | News

  WASHINGTON—"My God, just look at this," the 48-year-old government employee said as he surveyed the splintered furniture and mangled chandeliers that littered the 18-acre property. "Everything is gone. Our clothes, our family photos, the federal budget for fiscal year 2011—it's all gone." more»

  

• Kid Ready To Start Playdating Again

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.22.10 | News

  TAMPA, FL—"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous—after all, it's been a while since I've played spacemen with someone else," Kyle Gallagher said between small sips from a grape-juice box. "But I just can't worry about that kind of thing anymore. It's time to get back on that horse and see what's out there for me." more»

  

• 'Sliders Ended Two Seasons Too Early, If You Ask Me,' Says Sliders Creator To No One In Particular

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.24.10 | News

  LOS ANGELES—Sliders, the science fiction series that followed a group of adventurers who used a space-time wormhole to "slide" between parallel universes, ended its five-year run much too soon and with unresolved questions, show creator Robert Weiss said, unprompted, to literally nobody Tuesday. more»

  

• Obama's Fifth Gulf Coast Visit Really Helps A Lot

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.19.10 | News in Brief

  NEW ORLEANS—Critics were silenced today after President Barack Obama's fifth visit to the Gulf Coast vastly improved the devastated region. more»

• NBC Announces Fall Cancellation Lineup

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.20.10 | News in Brief

  NEW YORK—At a press conference Tuesday, the NBC television network unveiled its new fall lineup of programs that will be canceled almost immediately after airing. more»

• Area Man Going To Great Lengths To Conceal His Perfectly Normal Behavior

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.21.10 | News in Brief

  DENVER—Local account manager Kevin Verhulst turned off his phone, lied to coworkers, and left work early Wednesday in an elaborate ploy to prevent anyone from knowing that he was about to engage in behavior that would, at worst, be characterized as ... more»

• Budget Cuts Force British Government To Shut Down Mysterious Seaside Village

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.22.10 | News in Brief

  LONDON—Officials announced this week that the country's ongoing financial crisis would necessitate the closure of a mysterious seaside village operated by the British government since 1967. more»

• Amusement Park Rides Under Scrutiny

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.21.10 | Infographic

  Following the recent tragedy in which a Chinese ride called Space Journey malfunctioned and killed six people, many carnival rides are being more carefully inspected. more»

  

• Your Horoscopes - Week Of July 20, 2010

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.20.10 | Horoscope

  Aries Pain will be yours this week when that Man from Nantucket finally hears all the terrible things you've been writing about him. Taurus You'll soon popularize a new dance craze, thanks in large part to the large, fer... more»

• What Is The Moral Of The Story?

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.21.10 | Statshot

  

• Energetic Self-Starter Immediately Despised By Co-Workers

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.19.10 | Radio News

• Local Welder Develops Welders Block

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.20.10 | Radio News

• Endangered, Majestic Lowland Gorilla Exploited For Comic Effect

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.22.10 | Radio News

• M.I.T. Scientists Split The Smithereen

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.23.10 | Radio News

• No One Able To Tell Clam Just Had Stroke

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.20.10 | News in Photos

  

• Philly Cheesesteak Either Perfect or Disgusting

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.24.10 | News in Photos

  

• Honestly, This Might Not Be The Best Time To Get On Down To Rooney Honda

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.20.10 | Commentary

  We could definitely sell you a Honda—zero percent financing and no payments for six months, if that's what you want—but due to some recent circumstances I don't want to get into, I'd really have to advise against it. more»

• We Will Never Be United As A Nation As Long As There Are Other People Besides Myself

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.22.10 | Commentary

  There are two Americas, and unfortunately, I'm the only person alive who is truly able to see things from my point of view. Thus we have a long way to go before our nation becomes a nation of Kurts. more»

• 10 Summer Activities For Under A Trillion Dollars

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.24.10 | Sunday Magazine

  

• Massive Hit-And-Run Prematurely Ends Tour De France

  ISSUE 46•51 ISSUE 46•29 | 07.23.10 | Sports News

  POMAREZ, FRANCE—The 2010 Tour de France was canceled Friday morning following an incident during Stage 18 in which an unidentified automobile somehow found its way onto the course, struck each competing rider, and sped off without stopping. more»

  

• Families Of 9/11 Victims: Heat Losing 3 In A Row Would Be Much Worse Than World Trade Center Attacks

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.23.10 | Sports News in Brief

  NEW YORK—Following Dwyane Wade's controversial remarks likening the fall of the World Trade Center towers to his team having a losing streak, several families of 9/11 victims announced their support for Wade, saying that three consecutive regular-se... more»

• Yogi Berra: 'Why Aren't The Yankees Mourning My Death?'

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.24.10 | Sports News in Brief

  NEW YORK—Hall of Famer Yogi Berra expressed frustration and disappointment during a press conference Monday, asking why the Yankees organization had made no effort to mourn his death in 2006. more»

• Padres Grounds Crew Dims Stadium's Lights For Romantic Night Game

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.26.10 | Sports News in Brief

  SAN DIEGO—In an effort to reignite the fading passion between the Padres and Dodgers, the Petco Park grounds crew set the mood for a romantic night game Tuesday by dimming the stadium's lights, arranging rose petals along the baselines, and softly p... more»

• Highlights Of George Steinbrenner's Reign

  ISSUE 46•51 ISSUE 46•29 | 07.23.10 | Sportsgraphic

  His legacy is a strange mixture of winning baseball and strained relationships, but there's no denying George Steinbrenner was a colorful and remarkable man. We remember his defining moments. more»

  

• Louis Oosthuizen

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.23.10 | Strongside/Weakside

  Oosthuizen mildly shocked the world when he came from nowhere to win the 2010 Open Championship. Is he any good? more»

  

• Conceited Prick Thinks Other Conceited Prick Not Conceited Enough

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.23.10 | Photo Finish

  

• Jennifer Aniston Adopts 33-Year-Old Boyfriend From Africa

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.20.10 | Today Now!

  Today Now! welcomes entertainment reporter Alex Blair, who has all the gossip on Jen's adorable new man. more»

  

• Argentina Approves Gay Marriage

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.19.10 | American Voices

  Argentina narrowly passed a law allowing gay couples to marry, making it the first Latin American country to do so. more»

• Chrysler Unveils Minivan For Men

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.20.10 | American Voices

  Chrysler dealerships will soon be carrying an updated Dodge Grand Caravan minivan designed to appeal to men. more»

• 'Jersey Shore' Cast On Strike

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.21.10 | American Voices

  Cast members of the MTV reality series Jersey Shore are refusing to appear in a third season of the show until their salary of $10,000 per episode is increased. more»

• Senate Approves Jobless Benefits Extension

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.22.10 | American Voices

  Following an appointment to fill the seat of the recently deceased Robert Byrd, Senate Democrats have staved off a Republican filibuster and are set to extend unemployment benefits. more»

• E-Books Surpass Hardcovers At Amazon

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.23.10 | American Voices

  For every 100 hardcover books Amazon sold in the past three months, the online retailer sold 143 books for its Kindle e-reader. more»

• On The Continuing Feud Between Greg LeMond And Lance Armstrong

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.23.10 | Fan On The Street

• The Week In Review

  ISSUE 46•29 | 07.27.10 | Slideshow

  

• sun

  Afternoon: Delight