The Week In Review

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Issue 4641

NFL Considers Building Second Stadium

NEW YORK—NFL spokesman Greg Aiello announced Monday that, after years of deliberation, NFL team owners will vote on the proposed construction of a second football stadium in order to ease current difficulties with scheduling and overcrowding.

Brady Quinn Hasn't Heard That Name In Ages

DENVER—Upon overhearing visitors to the Broncos training facility inquire about third-string quarterback Brady Quinn, a young but grizzled Brady Quinn was seen to lean forward, raise his eyebrows, frown thoughtfully, and cast his eyes upward in appa...

Cyclist Friend Explains Necessity Of $35 Socks

MONESSEN, PA—Recreational cyclist Ethan Coseglia, 38, thoroughly explained the benefits of wearing $35 bike-riding socks to his friend Kevin Washburn Friday, saying that his specially designed socks are essential in optimizing his overall cycling performance.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Advertising

  • Sports Drink Company Putting First Advertisement On Moon

    Japanese pharmaceutical company Otsuka has announced plans to put their sports drink Pocari Sweat on the moon in a specially equipped container bearing their logo, which, if successful, would be the first time a commercial product has been flown to the mo...

Family

Report: Dad Wants To Show You Where Fuse Box Is

YOUR LOCATION—Noting that it’s important to be prepared in case of emergencies but it’s also a good thing to know in general, your dad announced today that he wants to show you where the fuse box is.

The Week In Review

8-Year-Old Asian Mix Wins Westminster Boy Show
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Morley Safer Can't Remember If He Left Stopwatch Running After Locking Up '60 Minutes' Studio
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Biden Invites Nation's Women To Tax Code Discussion At Private Mountain Chalet
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Congress Sets Sail In Search Of Fabled Sword Of Bipartisanship
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Miami Heat Website Going With Picture Of LeBron James Today
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Has Obama Failed To Reduce Hostility Toward Obnoxious Americans Abroad?
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Study: Women Always Answer Their Phones Unless They're Having Great Sex With Someone Else
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Colorado Wildfire Spreads To Moon
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Cyclist Friend Explains Necessity Of $35 Socks
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Sorry, We Can't Get It To Stop Printing In Landscape
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