HARLEM, NY—Globetrotters coaches announced Monday that, due to his shockingly inappropriate on-court behavior—including taking trick shots designed to injure opponents...

BOSTON—Though injured New England Patriots wide receiver Wes Welker has only been in the hospital for five days, doctors, nurses, support staff, and fellow ...

NEW YORK—Former St. Louis Cardinals slugger, onetime single-season home run record holder, and admitted steroid abuser Mark McGwire came clean Monday, confessing that it ...

CLEVELAND—Cavaliers center Shaquille O'Neal suffered a frustrating setback during his team's victory over the Toronto Raptors Tuesday night, when he was sidelined ...

MIAMI—Team officials from the New Orleans Saints and Indianapolis Colts emerged from a tense, 12-hour negotiating session Thursday and told reporters that, while they ...

MIAMI—As the Super Bowl captures the country's attention, excitement over the NFL's championship game is muted somewhat by the persistent question of ...

PONTE VEDRA BEACH, FL—In an announcement highly anticipated by sex fans around the world, Tiger Woods told a small gathering of reporters, family, and ...

WASHINGTON—Sen. Dikembe Mutombo (R-CO) showed that he is still one of the most dominant big men in Congress Thursday, blocking a record 16 bills ...

SHIPPENSBURG, PA—At first glance, 17-year-old Jeremy Davis looks like any other member of the Shippensburg Lions wrestling team. He jostles for key position against ...

ORLANDO, FL—Continuing a tradition that stretches back to his early years with the Miami Heat, Magic head coach Stan Van Gundy routinely presents his ...

HOUSTON—Nugget's forward Carmelo Anthony made no secret of his displeasure with game officials Monday night after being whistled for a rarely called traveling-through-time ...

SEATTLE—Baseball fans across the nation admitted Monday that the sight of Ken Griffey Jr. in a backwards baseball cap—an iconic image that once ...

AUGUSTA, GA—Sources close to Tiger Woods confirmed Friday that, due to the large number of women expected to attend this year's Masters...

NEW YORK—Expressing regret that joyless, wrongheaded ESPN commentator and attack journalist Skip Bayless could not be dealt with otherwise, commissioners from every major professional ...

NEW YORK—In what many are calling the greatest prank in the history of professional sports, an elaborate, far-reaching practical joke to trick Sam Bradford ...

UNNAMED DESERT—After providing his 2010 draft picks with only two canteens of water, a flashlight, and a cheap compass, New England Patriots head coach ...

BOWLING GREEN, KY—Claiming that "today's more active athlete needs better protection for his, well, come on, you know," sports equipment manufacturer Russell Athletic ...

BOSTON—According to official MLB statistics available as of press time, struggling Red Sox designated hitter David Ortiz is hitting only .200 and has tallied ...

LOS ANGELES—Calling the experience "a true honor" and "the opportunity of a lifetime," the infected synovial fluid recently drained from Kobe Bryant's right ...

WASHINGTON—President of the United States, basketball fan, and former Chicago resident Barack Obama once again weighed in on the future of LeBron James Wednesday ...

WILMINGTON, DE—As the 2010 World Cup approaches, friends, family, and coworkers of 32-year-old Brad Janovich are growing less tolerant of the exuberant behavior of ...

JOHANNESBURG—Members of the South Africa Vuvuzela Philharmonic Orchestra, widely considered to be among the best large-scale monotonic wind instrument ensembles in the world, told ...

LOS ANGELES—In his ongoing quest to find the finest and most powerful baseball bat ever crafted, Dodgers outfielder Manny Ramirez embarked on an epic ...

CLEVELAND—Shocked Cleveland residents stared silently Thursday as workers tried for the 11th consecutive day to dismantle the massive black-and-white "We Are All Witnesses" LeBron ...

POMAREZ, FRANCE—The 2010 Tour de France was canceled Friday morning following an incident during Stage 18 in which an unidentified automobile somehow found its ...

TEMPE, AZ—BCS 9000, the sentient heuristic computer responsible for arranging five championship bowl games at the end of each college football season, reportedly uncovered ...

NEW YORK—Looking to cover every possible angle of NFL training camp, Sports Illustrated has once again unleashed its army of 350,000 Peter King ...

MIAMI—The Florida Marlins delayed the start of their game against the St. Louis Cardinals last Sunday when Steve, their fan, failed to show up ...

RUTHERFORD, NJ—As the first round of preseason games drew to a close Monday, NFL sources reported that the league's 164 closeted gay players ...

DALLAS—Saying that it would probably be best if everyone sat down for this, seven-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong informed the U.S.

PHOENIX—The Arizona Diamondbacks organization apologized to fans, their families, and the community at large Thursday after more than 16,000 people attending the previous ...

NEW ORLEANS—Drew Brees, Super Bowl–winning quarterback of the Saints and local hero, spent a few minutes during a routine press conference Tuesday wondering ...

NEW YORK—A recent Nike commercial featuring star players from both the NBA and NFL also includes an evidently prominent African-American female athlete, though sources ...

WALPOLE, NH—Exhausted and haggard documentarian Ken Burns begged Major League Baseball to cease operations Tuesday, saying that any future games, trades, or league action ...

CLEVELAND—During the fourth quarter of their game last Sunday, the Cleveland Browns offense was caught attempting to sneak a 23-year-old female fan into their ...

VANCOUVER—World Champion skier and Olympic gold medal favorite Lindsey Vonn admitted yesterday that the secret to her success is her "really, really good ski ...

ATLANTA—In recent accounts of Spud Webb's astounding victory in the 1986 NBA Slam-Dunk Contest, basketball fans across the nation have reportedly exaggerated the ...

DOYLESTOWN, PA—After three hours of watching Canada take on Denmark in women's curling Friday, regulars at the Cargo Grill in suburban Pennsylvania felt ...

NEW YORK—The 32-team field of the 2010 NIT took a businesslike attitude toward getting the tournament over with Wednesday, with participants entering Madison Square ...

SYRACUSE, NY—Despite overcoming long odds as the lowest seed remaining in the NCAA...

DURHAM, NC—NCAA officials announced Wednesday that seven losses would be stricken from Duke's 2008-2009 season record, claiming they were forced to act after ...

WASHINGTON—During an emotionally charged press conference Monday, newly minted Redskins...

NEW YORK—Law enforcement specialists who responded to reports of a ticking draft timer at Radio City Music Hall Thursday night are being praised for ...

SALT LAKE CITY—An uneasy sense of anxiety overtook the crowd at EnergySolutions Arena Sunday as fans watched a pumped-up Jazz team break their pregame ...

CLEVELAND—Cavaliers forward LeBron James railed against the harsh conditions of referee camps in the developing world Wednesday, calling attention to the plight of millions ...

NEW YORK—Hall of Fame Giants linebacker Lawrence Taylor responded to allegations that he raped a minor by asking reporters at a press conference Monday ...

BOSTON—The Philadelphia Flyers came back from three games down to defeat the Boston Bruins in their best-of-seven playoff series last week, a historic feat ...

CLEVELAND—In response to his recent firing, former Cavaliers head coach Mike Brown said at a press conference Wednesday that he was unfairly singled out ...

WASHINGTON—The NBA Finals have thrown the nation's basketball fans into a state of angry confusion this week, as the bitter debate over whether ...

NEW YORK—After years of sitting idly by as Hall of Fame quarterback Joe Montana lent his name to Tombstone frozen pizza, McCormick spices and ...

PHILADELPHIA—The most riveting, nail-biting, and story-laden playoff series in the past several years of professional sports had the misfortune of reaching its amazing overtime ...

PEBBLE BEACH, CA—Overcome by problems in his personal life, an inability to get his golf game in order, and his foundering public image, Tiger ...

SEATTLE—Mariner fans unknowingly witnessed history Monday when veteran umpire Tony Candeleo became only the 11th umpire in major-league history to call a perfect officiating ...

JOHANNESBURG—Although the nation is receiving positive reviews of its job hosting the 2010 FIFA World Cup, South Africa was shocked to discover Monday that ...

WASHINGTON—During a six-hour committee hearing Sunday at McKenzie's Pub on 14th and G Streets, the U.S.

LAS VEGAS—The World Boxing Organization, International Boxing Federation, and World Boxing Association held separate press conferences Monday resulting in the eventual announcement that Manny ...

PITTSBURGH—After losing their fifth straight game Monday, the Pittsburgh Pirates were mathematically eliminated from Major League Baseball, having fallen to a 36-69 record that ...

LOS ANGELES—Former Raiders quarterback JaMarcus Russell is currently in a Los Angeles Police Department bathroom failing a drug test, records will confirm Wednesday when ...

CHICAGO—Rookie defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh, the Lions' first pick in this year's NFL draft, lived up to expectations Sunday by recording the first ...

The Saints' road to their first Super Bowl wasn't an easy one, as for years they were one of the unluckiest, most bumbling franchises ...

As the 21st Winter Games draw to a close, we look back on moments that will live on in Olympic history.

Tiger Woods' public apology for serial philandering reminds us how athletes have always found sex as problematic as it is easy for them to get.

For decades it's been assumed that making the cover of Sports Illustrated equals bad luck.

His legacy is a strange mixture of winning baseball and strained relationships, but there's no denying George Steinbrenner was a colorful and remarkable man ...

Steam Room analysts debate whether the International Fencing Federation should rein in this rogue, or if De La Croix will narrowly escape yet again.

Chris Lukawski, a longtime devotee of the Packers and beer, is confident his battered liver and family can handle another NFL season of unrestrained alcohol ...

The NCAA will investigate the Kentucky program for major recruiting violations including improper gifts of milk bones and rope tug toys.

Fresh from his Blue Grass Stakes win, Hollins moves onto the Kentucky Derby where he hopes to be the first to mercilessly beat a horse ...