'I Killed Myself' One Man's Lost Battle With Alcoholism

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Issue 4807

Oh Fuck, What The Fuck Is That?

Animal 7 p.m. EST/6 p.m. CST A woman talks about the time she saw what had to be a centipede just sitting there in her bathroom—covered in fur and the size of her fucking arm—but when she came back it was gone and that's even more terrifying.

Smug New Mom Going To Start A Blog

SAN FRANCISCO—Three days after giving birth, first-time mother Courtney Baldritch has registered with the web service WordPress for the purpose of blogging the severely underdocumented experience of child-rearing.

Come Away With Me

Fox 9 p.m. EST/8 p.m. CST Norah Jones sips a glass of wine and watches people have sex to Norah Jones songs.

Chinese National Found Guilty Of Stealing Trade Secrets

A former Motorola software engineer was found guilty of stealing industrial secrets, though acquitted of charges she intended to commit espionage on behalf of China. Here are some of the secrets she may have been trying to smuggle out of the country:...

Heath Ledger 

"In the last one, they flipped over a semi and blew up an entire hospital, so don't tell me they can't use a little movie magic to bring back Heath Ledger." - Erin Matthews

So, How Was Afghanistan?

Welcome back! Wow, I almost didn't recognize you. How long has it been? It seems like forever since you left for Afghanistan.

Your Horoscopes - Week Of February 14, 2012

Aries Your health continues to decline as your skin becomes too sensitive to endure sunlight and your soul remains too sensitive to endure dark, smoky bars. Taurus While you admire his technical execution and admit he ha...

Bus Bowl

Fox 5 p.m. EST/4 p.m. CST Traveling from Nebraska to Nevada, John Madden invites some lesser MVPs to come aboard his bus and toss the ball around.

Championship Celebration Moments

The Giants shut down Manhattan for half the day Tuesday with their NFL championship parade, and while magnificent, it didn't register alongside these epic sports victory celebrations: 
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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