Top Headlines

Issue 4826

Whatevs House

This house is pretty cool. It can get a little hot in the summertime, but no big deal. It's pretty roomy.

Your Dream Home!

Sometimes, dreams do come true. Not this time, though. Buy this mediocre home and then imagine you live somewhere much, much better.

Phil Mickelson's Shower Caddy Recommends Sudsy 9-Iron

RANCHO SANTA FE, CA—Approaching the halfway point of a solid round of bathing Sunday, Phil Mickelson followed the advice of his shower caddy and used a sudsy 9-iron for his approach shot instead of the shampoo-covered pitching wedge he had originall...

Republicans, Leukemia Team Up To Repeal Health Care Law

WASHINGTON—In the coming weeks, Republicans and leukemia will travel the country in an effort to diminish support for the increasingly popular bill, which GOP sources said goes against everything that Republicans and the massive accumulation of toxic cells stand for.

World News

BBC AMERICA 7 p.m. EDT/6 p.m. CDT Broaden your horizons by watching news filtered through British national and corporate interests for a change.

Your Horoscopes

Taurus: The rise of Jupiter in your sign indicates that Jesus Christ, come on now, get your goddamn finances in order already.

Landmark Gay Rights Cases

With eight states now having legalized same-sex marriage, gay rights have come a long way in the past 100 years. Here are some court cases that have marked key victories for the movement:
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