The Week In Pictures – Week Of July 8, 2013

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Issue 4927

Belichick To Tebow: ‘I’m Your Lord And Savior Now’

BOSTON—Warning that he was a dark and vengeful God, New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick reportedly pulled aside Tim Tebow at the team’s facilities Thursday and informed the backup quarterback that he was his only Lord and savior now...

New Tandem Mobility Scooter Released

A dying kid in Houston is holding on until the Astros develop a player worth meeting, fossilized evidence reveals the Spazosaurus was the largest doofus ever to roam the earth, and a Facebook friend is apparently under the impression that Ron Paul is stil...

Sibling Bullying Just As Bad As Peer Bullying

A recent study found that kids who were physically or psychologically bullied by siblings suffered comparable or even worse mental health outcomes than if they were bullied by neighbors or classmates.

U.S. Celebrates Independence Day

Americans are enjoying the day off with friends and family in celebration of the 237th anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence.

BREAKING: Lovers Lost In Fog

‘Isabelle!’

SEDGECREST GRANGE—According to reports currently emanating from the sullen gloom of Sedgecrest Grange, two young lovers, mere moments after their impetuous peregrination into the dusky marshlands, have become hopelessly lost and separated, their eve...
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TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Family

Report: Dad Wants To Show You Where Fuse Box Is

YOUR LOCATION—Noting that it’s important to be prepared in case of emergencies but it’s also a good thing to know in general, your dad announced today that he wants to show you where the fuse box is.

Race Relations

The Week In Pictures – Week Of July 8, 2013

Sesame Street: 'Bert And Ernie Are Not Gay, They Are Depraved Pansexual Perverts'
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Fossilized Evidence Reveals Spazosaurus Was Largest Doofus To Ever Roam Earth
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16-Year-Old Excited To Have Whole Summer To Plan Shooting For Next School Year
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New Wearable Computer Also Sucks Your Dick
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Apparently Facebook Friend Under Impression Ron Paul Still Running For Major Federal Office
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Dying Kid In Houston Holding On Until Astros Develop Player Worth Meeting
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Kids Tired Of Hearing Boring Stories About How Father A Skilled, Generous Lover
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Report: 79% Of Sincere Thoughts Played Off As Jokes
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Universe Crueler, More Uncaring Place Than Previously Thought
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BREAKING: Lovers Lost In Fog
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Justin Upton Realizes He’s Been At Bat For 4 Hours
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Farmer Who Cleared Out Crops To Build Baseball Field Goes Bankrupt, Loses Family, Arrested For Tax Evasion
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Cubs Players Heckle Lackluster Fans In Wrigley Field Stands
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