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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.
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Do You Approve Of The NSA Spying On Citizens?

  • Yes. It’s nice to have someone listening besides God.
  • I wasn’t doing much with my civil liberties anyway, to be honest.
  • No. I don’t need some government agency to thwart terrorism for me.
  • They’re welcome to try, but as a fair warning, I only type at one speed: fast.
  • I like knowing there’s an audience for my little show.
  • No. My correspondences with my best friend Greg are between me and Greg.
  • Yes, as long as they offer constructive criticism and keep in mind that I’m a work in progress.
  • Well, there haven’t been any terrorist attacks here in Olathe, KS, so I’m fine with it.

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