SALEM, OR—Saying their respective justifications were “good to go” whenever necessary, local couple Mark Wondrich, 25, and Cara Marshall, 27, reported Friday that they each have a comprehensive list of reasons why they should break up with the other on standby.
- No; I need overwhelming scientific evidence before I’ll believe something like that.
- Yes. I haven’t seen a single glacier anywhere.
- Only in a metaphorical sense.
- Not until the Costa Rican variable harlequin toad dies out for good.
- I’m close, but I’ll need to see a slightly melted earth on the cover of ‘Time’ magazine first.
- Yes, because in this day and age we all need to believe in something.
- I don’t, but that hasn’t ruined ‘The Day After Tomorrow’ for me.
- That’s neither here nor there. Two people in the parking lot saw you leave your dog inside the vehicle. Come with me.