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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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Do You Plan To Sign Up For Obamacare?

  • I’d like to see a few more government shutdowns first.
  • Yes. I want to be part of history in a small, dull way.
  • No. I have a preexisting condition and have come to believe I don’t deserve insurance.
  • I don’t plan for anything, baby.
  • Not sure. I’m one of those ‘not sure’ people in polls.
  • Yes. I just moved to the city and I’m hoping to make new friends this way.
  • I’m sorry, are you referring to the Affordable Care Act? No way!
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