JACKSONVILLE, FL—Eating their meals and conversing pleasantly without paying any heed to how loosely the string was wrapped around the young child’s finger, diners at a local Panera Bread reportedly went about their lunch Wednesday completely unaware that 2-year-old Nate Pollen’s tenuous grasp on a red helium balloon was the only thing standing between peace and total anarchy.
- Yes. Without college I could never have landed this job curating blog content all day.
- No. Some of us were pegged as unskilled labor a loooooong time ago.
- Maybe—it depends on which of my kids you’re asking about.
- Of course. You can’t put a price on great memories, even though someone did and it’s almost $200,000.
- Yes. I own several universities and they are very profitable.
- No. Provosts are not to be trusted.
- Absolutely. It’s important to get into debt early while you still have a lot of life left to ruin.
- Yes. You can’t truly earn a Florida State sweatshirt by just buying one.