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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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Do You Trust The Mainstream Media?

  • No, but propaganda that I agree with is good enough for me.
  • Yes, but then again, I once ate an unpeeled orange because my friend told me it would clear up my acne.
  • I heard someone call it the lame-stream media and I was like, ‘Right?’
  • If they can trust me not to take all the newspapers in the box, I can trust them.
  • I don’t really have an opinion. Just color my state orange.
  • Yep. They’ve been right about every movie showtime since I can remember.
  • Only when it comes to matters of the heart.
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