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Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

Voter Fraud: Myth Vs. Fact

Concerns over fraudulent voting have grown since the 2016 election, with President Trump himself claiming that millions of people voted illegally. The Onion debunks some common myths about voter fraud.
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Should Employers Be Required To Offer Paid Maternity Leave?

  • Absolutely not. Then people will get the idea that this country will invest in kids the rest of the time they’re growing up.
  • Yes. Companies who don’t want to pay should have just fired the employee when she got pregnant.
  • No, the first few weeks are essential bonding time for a newborn and her au pair.
  • Absolutely. It’s the only way we’re going to get rid of Jan.
  • Of course, as long as it’s 80 percent of what a pregnant man would be paid.
  • Yes, but when they come back they can never speak about what transpired ever again.
  • No way. What are we, nearly every other nation in the world?

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Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

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