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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Should We Raise Taxes On The Rich To Redistribute Wealth?

  • No, that goes against the oligarchic principles on which this country stands.
  • Can’t we give the nation’s wealthy a moment’s peace?
  • Absolutely not. The only thing this will do is punish success and provide a half-decent standard of living for millions of people.
  • Why fix what’s not broken for an incredibly small minority of people?
  • No. That’s what the tip jar is for.
  • Wa-hoo! Do I get to talk about tax policy now?
  • No way. Unless a majority of Americans agree on it, and research finds that rising inequality among top earners and middle and lower classes is unsustainable and likely to have major destabilizing political and economic consequences.
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