20,000 Sacrificed In Annual Blood Offering To Corporate America
WILMINGTON, DE—The nation looked on in reverence Friday as 20,000 citizens were decapitated, dismembered, and burned alive in the name of Corporate America ...
Boy Believed To Be Next Reincarnation Of Regional KFC Manager Discovered In Chatfield, MN
LOUISVILLE, KY—According to sources at the corporate headquarters of fast food giant KFC, a young boy believed to be the third reincarnation of the ...
Wow Factor Added To Corporate Presentation
CHARLOTTE, NC—Sources confirmed that the wow factor—an intangible set of viscerally pleasing features that instill onlookers with a feeling of exhilaration and intense ...
Third-Party Cola Demands Ad-Campaign-Finance Reform
COLUMBUS, GA—Promising a "bold new choice" in refreshment, RC Cola President John Sunderland criticized the overuse of corporate soft-drink money.
CEO's Success Credited To Unbelievable Handshake
SAN DIEGO—Garrett Maddox has worked his way up the corporate ladder, one handshake at a time.
