Man Does Good Job Getting Drunk
ETNA, PA—Moments after watching him finish his fifth alcoholic beverage at the Crow’s Nest Bar and Grill Thursday night, sources reported local man ...
Future Christian Drinking And Doing Drugs And Thinking It's One Big Joke
WAUKEGAN, IL—Without any concern for what his self-destructive habits are doing to him and to his relationship with the Lord, future born-again Christian Travis ...
Biden Criticized For Appearing In Hennessy Ads
Citing White House Pressure, Hennessy pulled the Biden ads saying "Joe will always epitomize the smooth, original style of our world class cognac."
Nation's Unemployment Outlook Improves Drastically After Fifth Beer
WASHINGTON—"All these goddamn layoffs, they're totally a blessing in disguise," said Donald Ellington, a completely hammered senior adviser at JPMorgan Chase.
Man At Bar Has Incredibly Complicated Reason For Why He Enjoys Rolling Rock
IDAHO FALLS, ID—Misinterpreting a bartender's raised eyebrow as an unspoken question, Kenny's Bar patron Neil Plottman delivered a long,...
