Report: $14 Trillion Spent Annually On Trying To Look Cool
WASHINGTON—A report released Monday by the U.S. Department of Commerce revealed that Americans spend an astonishing $14 trillion a year on countless, usually ...
New Device Desirable, Old Device Undesirable
SEATTLE—"The new device is an improvement over the old device, making it more attractive for purchase by all Americans," said Thomas Wakefield, a spokesperson ...
Cell Phone Stuck In 2-Year Contract With Local Man
LAS CRUCES, NM—Though it has been the victim of rampant physical and verbal abuse and feels terrorized by its demanding, possessive partner,...
Yamaha CEO Pleased With Current Production Of Jet Skis, Alto Saxophones, Snowmobiles, Power Generators, Scooters, Golf Carts
HAMAMATSU, JAPAN—Despite concerns over the recent global recession, Yamaha Corporation president Mitsuru Umemura announced last week that he...
Sanyo Praying Area Man Doesn't Send In Rebate Form
OSAKA, JAPAN—Company accountants have determined that Sanyo would need to sell at least two more phones or six clock radios to offset the devastation ...
