Businessman Goes Home For The Holidays To Network With Family
NEW YORK—Emphasizing the importance of “developing contacts and getting your name out there,” sales coordinator Keith Elliott told reporters on Tuesday that he was ...
Area Woman Just Itching To Complain If Anyone Objects To Nativity Scene In Park
HUNTINGTON, WV—Local resident Ann Jacobsen announced Tuesday that she is “champing at the bit” to complain to township officials should anyone object to a ...
Study Finds Millennial Generation Stays On Phone With Parents Throughout Entire Day
DURHAM, NC—In a groundbreaking study published this week in the Journal Of Social Psychology, scientists reported that members of the millennial generation typically spend ...
That's Fine, Area Girlfriend To See 'Anna Karenina' When Visiting Mom Over Christmas
PHILADELPHIA—Having been talked by her boyfriend into seeing Skyfall instead, a movie he insisted they would both enjoy, local girlfriend Chelsea Condos, 27, confirmed ...
Christmas Letter Ominously Makes No Mention Of The Twins
GREECE, NY—Though the annual Christmas letter from the Thompsons addresses Elliot's first semester at college and Mom's new job, it eerily makes ...
