Obama Fondly Recalls Frustration Of First Term
WASHINGTON—Saying that those were definitely some good times, a reflective President Obama told reporters Friday that the current scandals plaguing his administration have made ...
Nation Supposes It's Outraged By White House Scandals
'I Guess It's Bad, Sure,' Populace Shrugs
WASHINGTON—Reacting to the number of major scandals currently plaguing the White House, a somewhat confused American populace told reporters Friday that yeah, sure, they ...
Joint Chiefs Chairman Pretty Sure He Could Pull Off Junta If He Really Wanted To
WASHINGTON—While stressing that he has no plans to mount such an insurrection, Joint Chiefs of Staff chairman Martin Dempsey told reporters Friday that if ...
The Onion Urges Barack Obama To Come Clean About The Basilisk Project
This week, President Barack Obama and his administration have come under fire from political opponents seeking an explanation for the White House’s alleged complicity ...
Obama Supporter Has Perfectly Improbable Explanation Absolving President From Blame For Scandals
CORTLAND, NY—Amid mounting scrutiny over scandals involving last September’s attack on the U.S.
