LONDONーShortly after Leicester City’s improbable title run culminated in the club clinching their first championship, executives from the Premier League issued a statement Sunday vowing that order will soon be restored.
LEICESTER, ENGLAND—In anticipation of the club’s first-ever top-flight league championship in its 132-year history, officials from the Leicestershire Police announced Monday that they have deployed additional forces in order to join in with Leicester City fans celebrating their Premier League title.
CHICAGO—Honoring his many achievements both on and off the field throughout his glittering career, the Phillie Phanatic was officially inducted Monday into the National Italian American Sports Hall of Fame.
CHICAGO—Stressing that “it’s only April” and that “there’s a lot of baseball still to play,” Cubs fans throughout Chicago told reporters Thursday that they remain cautiously optimistic about their World Series chances after pitcher Jake Arrieta threw his eighth no-hitter of the season, with the team scoring over 30 runs for the 12th straight game.
BRISTOL, CT—Following his recent termination from ESPN as a result of his controversial comments regarding transgender rights, baseball commentator and former Major League pitcher Curt Schilling told reporters Thursday he is quietly relieved he will no longer need to censor himself for three hours each week on Monday Night Baseball.
NEW BERLIN, WI—Making sure to date the page before recording all the juiciest and most private details from his daily exercise routine, local gym-goer Phillip Keller reportedly took out his precious little diary Thursday in order to keep track of his workout.
ATLANTA—Stressing that most of the competitions over the past several seasons have been “boring” and “totally unwatchable,” Hall of Famer and Inside The NBA analyst Charles Barkley insisted Monday night that modern basketball fans wouldn’t stand a chance of winning during the far tougher halftime contests of the 1990s.
LOS ANGELES—Amid a massive outpouring of acclaim from fans, fellow athletes, and media members ahead of his retirement, players on the Los Angeles Lakers admitted to reporters Thursday that they are kind of curious what it must be like to be inspired by Kobe Bryant.
HAMPTON, VA—Explaining that the team’s regular-season dominance made him unlikely to question any accomplishment attributed to them, local 29-year-old Jared Dwyer told reporters Thursday that he is ready to believe absolutely any statistic about how good the Golden State Warriors were this year.