10 Easy Exercises You Can Do At The Office

Top Headlines

Healthy Living

Dairy Good

The Onion’s Guide To Gym Etiquette

Every new year brings a surge in gym membership from new members nicknamed “resolutionists,” many of whom may be unaware that there are unspoken rules everyone must observe when working out.

Personal Trainer Impressed By Man’s Improved Excuses

SAN JOSE, CA—Acknowledging that the progress made in such a short amount of time was remarkable, Club One Fitness personal trainer Logan Kaiser told reporters Tuesday he is very impressed by the improvement in both the strength and consistency of hi...

Paula Deen Sponsors .05K Walk For Diabetes Research

SAVANNAH, GA—Celebrity chef and restaurateur Paula Deen announced Monday that her recently launched Step for a Cure Foundation would host its first annual .05K fun walk on May 20 to raise money for Type 2 diabetes research. The star of the Food Netw...

Exercise Briefly Considered

GERMANTOWN, TN—The notion of aerobic exercise fleetingly crossed the mind of Memphis-area office manager Theodore Sperling Monday. "There was half an hour to kill before Monday Night Football," Sperling said, "and I thought for a few seconds that maybe I should go for a walk around the block." After raising himself from the couch, however, Sperling instead walked to the kitchen for a leftover pork chop from that evening's dinner and returned to the living room, where he briefly channel-surfed before settling on a Game Show Network rerun of Match Game '75.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Fatherhood

  • Father Apologizes For Taking Out Anger On Wrong Son

    ELIZABETH, NJ—Moments after losing his composure with an unwarranted emotional outburst, local father David Kessler reportedly apologized to his son Christopher Thursday for erroneously taking out his anger on him and not his older brother Peter.

Preparedness

  • Doctors Recommend Getting 8 Centuries Of Cryosleep

    STANFORD, CA—Claiming that the practice is essential for effectively recharging the body and waking fully rested and alert, doctors at Stanford University issued a report Monday emphasizing the importance of getting at least eight centuries of atomi...

Healthy Living

Dairy Good

10 Easy Exercises You Can Do At The Office

Finding time in your schedule to work out can be difficult, which is why performing a few easy exercises at the office can be the perfect way for a busy person to stay in shape. For example, sneak in a low-impact training session during a weekly budget meeting by doing a few sets of lunges.
Work those fast-twitch muscles by repeatedly flipping the light switch in the conference room.
Desktop computers can double as fitness balls. Simply unplug your machine, seat yourself on the monitor, and gently bounce up and down to strengthen your core.
For a good cardio workout with added resistance, run five laps around the office with the photocopier strapped to your back.
Build muscle mass by doing several sets of desk calendar curls. Seated in your chair, firmly grip a desk calendar and raise it toward your shoulder in a controlled motion. If you find it too challenging, keep ripping out months until the weight is more comfortable.
Your boss looks like he weighs, what, 190? 195? Pick him up.
Chair tosses are a great way to bulk up. Stand in front of your desk. Grip your chair and throw it straight up in front of you. The legs should clear your head each time. Do three sets of 50.
To get a good full-body workout, pull the fire alarm, stand in the exit, and push back against your coworkers as they try to escape down the stairs.
Swimming can burn lots of calories with little impact on your joints. Fill your office with at least four feet of water and practice a variety of strokes.
Work your shoulders and triceps by packing your belongings in this box and leaving by 5 p.m.