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As Detroit prepares to demolish and say goodbye to the storied Joe Louis Arena, Onion Sports examines some of the greatest stadiums of all time.

Bo Obama Addresses Graduates Of Dayton Obedience School

DAYTON, OH—Calling on the 2017 class of canines to make the most of their training as they head out into the world, former first dog Bo Obama delivered a stirring commencement speech Friday to graduates of the Dayton Obedience School.

‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Mom Finds Disturbing Reading Material In Teenage Son’s Bedroom

OMAHA, NE—Saying she felt disgusted and saddened by the shocking discovery, local woman Beth Loomis told reporters Thursday that she was deeply disturbed after finding recruitment reading material from the Baylor University football team in her teenage son’s bedroom.

Most Notable Google Ventures

Ten years ago this week, Google Street View launched, offering panoramic views of locations all over the world. As the tech giant continues to debut new projects, The Onion highlights some of Google’s most ambitious ventures to date:

Rural Working-Class Archbishops Come Out In Droves To Welcome Trump To Vatican

VATICAN CITY—Arriving in their dusty pickup trucks from as far away as the dioceses of Oria and Locri-Gerace to express their support for a leader who they say embodies their interests and defends their way of life, droves of rural working-class archbishops reportedly poured into St. Peter’s Square today to greet U.S. president Donald Trump during his visit to the Vatican.

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ATLANTA—Noting how important it is to make a good first impression, Pittsburgh Pirates rookie first baseman Josh Bell told reporters before Tuesday’s game against the Atlanta Braves that he’s still nervous about chatting with opposing baserunners.
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10 Sandwiches That Look Like British Novelist Martin Amis

Woah, did somebody order the 64-year old author of Time’s Arrow and London Fields? ’Cause that’s what this pesto chicken sandwich looks almost exactly like.
While this might look identical to two-time Man Booker Prize nominee Martin Amis, don’t go asking for an autograph—it’s actually a classic New Orleans po’boy on crusty French bread.
This mouthwatering tuna melt spends more time on the grill than painting brutal caricatures of Western excess, but you could have fooled us.
Sometimes a simple egg salad sandwich is just what the doctor ordered, especially when it so closely doubles the stoic features of the last half century’s premier Welsh-born novelist. Yum!
Lunchtime! This classic BLT is a dead ringer for Amis in his younger years, right after he first broke out onto the literary scene in 1973 with The Rachel Papers.
Grilled cheese, just like Mom used to make! Except Mom’s version never looked like the occasionally maligned bad boy of British letters who once claimed that “awards only go to boring books.”
This one takes a little while, but if you stare at this Italian combo footlong with hot peppers and provolone long enough, it almost looks a little like Martin Amis right after he wrote the 1995 bestseller The Information.
It’s certainly not hard to imagine this corned beef sandwich sitting down at a typewriter in London and churning out all 149 pages of Night Train.
It wouldn’t have been surprising if Britain’s Society of Authors bestowed the 1974 Somerset Maugham Award on this chicken salad sandwich on wheat, because it is the spitting image of Mr. Amis himself.
Okay, so this smoked beef brisket sandwich from Montreal’s famous Schwartz’s deli looks more like British playwright Harold Pinter than Martin Amis, but it’s still pretty close.

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‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

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