adBlockCheck

Politics

Rural Working-Class Archbishops Come Out In Droves To Welcome Trump To Vatican

VATICAN CITY—Arriving in their dusty pickup trucks from as far away as the dioceses of Oria and Locri-Gerace to express their support for a leader who they say embodies their interests and defends their way of life, droves of rural working-class archbishops reportedly poured into St. Peter’s Square today to greet U.S. president Donald Trump during his visit to the Vatican.

Trump: ‘I Am A Very Stupid Human Being’

WASHINGTON—Responding to a damning ‘Washington Post’ report alleging he had shared highly classified information with Russian officials, President Donald Trump addressed the concerns of the press, his fellow government officials, and the public at large Tuesday by announcing that he was an incredibly stupid human being.

Escalating Tensions Lead Trump To Shake Up Inner Circle Of TV Programs

WASHINGTON—Saying the decision arose out of the necessity to weed out certain key members whose values no longer aligned with the president’s, White House spokesman Sean Spicer told reporters Thursday that escalating tensions have led President Trump to shake up his inner circle of television programs.
End Of Section
  • More News

2011's Biggest Political Newsmakers

Gabby Giffords: Congresswoman whose January shooting sparked a national conversation about national conversations, and whether it was worth having them. The conclusion being that it wasn't.
Mitt Romney: Spent 50 minutes every night carefully scrubbing every inch of himself clean after meeting real, everyday Americans.
Anthony Weiner: The fallout from the former New York congressman’s sexting scandal scuttled Weiner’s career and surely was embarrassing enough to prevent any other politician from ever conducting themself with so little discretion.
Rick Perry: Texas governor and Republican presidential candidate who carefully positioned himself as the anti-Romney by making no sense in debate performances, repeatedly embarrassing himself, and honing a widely disrespected public image.
Barack Obama: Really hit his stride in his third year in office, prompting a record 214 angry e-mail forwards from your grandfather about how the president was bent on undermining the economy, the country in general, and Christianity.
Michele Bachmann: Minnesota congresswoman known for her strong social conservatism as well as her kindness in providing foster care for 23 children and one closeted gay man.
Newt Gingrich: With his sudden rise to the top of GOP polls, many experts now say Gingrich could become the nation's first shit golem president.

More from this section

Trump: ‘I Am A Very Stupid Human Being’

WASHINGTON—Responding to a damning ‘Washington Post’ report alleging he had shared highly classified information with Russian officials, President Donald Trump addressed the concerns of the press, his fellow government officials, and the public at large Tuesday by announcing that he was an incredibly stupid human being.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close